The importance of making dua’ for your children.

Have you heard about the story of an ‘alim name Fudhail bin ‘Iyadh? (فضيل بن عياض)

Imam Az-Zahabi in his book Siyar A’lam An Nubala mentioned Fudhail bin ‘Iyadh (187H)as someone who is very pious, knowledgeable, wara’, thiqqoh and very active in doing Ibadah ( 8:422).

Ibn Mubarak also stated that “the best human in this generation is Fudhail bin ‘Iyadh”

‎خير الناس الفضيل بن عياض

Besides all his credibilities, he felt that one of his flaws is his inability to educate & nurture his son. He strongly believes that Allah the Almighty is the only One who can nurture his son.

One of his famous dua’ :

‎ اللهم إني اجتهدت أن أؤدب علياً فلم أقدر على تأديبه، فأدبه لي

“Oh Allah, I have tried my very best to nurture my son but I still feel inadequate in doing so, so please Allah nurture him for me”

Fudhail’s son : ‘Ali then becomes God-fearing servant and a soft hearted one. Everytime he came across verses of the Quran that mentioned about the torments of the hell-fire or Allah’s wrath, he will cry and faint.

In fact, Ali bin Fudhail bin ‘Iyadh died upon hearing this verses when his father was praying:

‎وَبَدَا لَهُم مِّنَ اللَّهِ مَا لَمْ يَكُونُوا يَحْتَسِبُونَ

“And there will appear to them from Allah what they have never imagined” (Az-Zumar: 47)

From this story, we can see how making dua’ for our children is the most important factor in our tarbiyah journey.

Rasulullah PBUH said :

عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ، عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ‏:‏ ثَلاَثُ دَعَوَاتٍ مُسْتَجَابَاتٍ‏:‏ دَعْوَةُ الْمَظْلُومِ، وَدَعْوَةُ الْمُسَافِرِ، وَدَعْوَةُ الْوَالِدِ عَلَى وَلَدِهِ‏.‏

( الأدب المفرد – كتاب الاعتناء بالدنيا)

Abu Hurayra reported that the Prophet (PBUH) said, “There are three supplications which are answered:

the supplication of the person who is wronged, the supplication of the traveller, and the supplication of a parent for his child.

Source: Al Adab Al Mufrad ( chapter : attending to this world)

Grade : Sahih (Albani)

Our goal as a muslim parents is not as simple as making sure the kids are well-fed, graduated from the top universities, earning high incomes.

But our goal as an intentional parents is to raise God-fearing humans with strong aqeedah and good morale. And that can only be achieved with the help from Allah.

And as the hadith mentioned above, a parent’s prayer will not be rejected. So make dua’ to Allah that He gives you strength within yourself to nurture your children. That He will give the ability to cope with the parenting struggles. Pray that Allah will send help through the people around you.

If a renowned scholar like Al Fudhail bin ‘Iyadh felt that he is unable to nurture his son, then what about us? We are living in this times of fitnah, certainly the first step in doing tarbiyah for our kids and raise them upon Quran and Sunnah-is by making lots of dua’.

There are some dua’ for offsprings mentioned in the Quran:

1. Prophet Ibrahim (AS)’s dua’:

رَبِّ هَب لِي مِنَ الصَّالِحِين

“Oh my Lord, bless me with a righteous son” ( As-Saaffat : 100)

2. Prophet Ibrahim (AS)’s dua’ :

رَبِّ اجْعَلْنِي مُقِيمَ الصَّلَاةِ وَمِنْ ذُرِّيَّتِي ۚ رَبَّنَا وَتَقَبَّلْ دُعَاءِ

“Oh my Lord, make me steadfast in Salah and my offspring too. And our Lord, grant our prayer.

3. Prophet Zakariya (AS)’s dua’:

رَبِّ هَبْ لِي مِنْ لَدُنْكَ ذُرِّيَّةً طَيِّبَةً إِنَّكَ سَمِيعُ الدُّعَاء

“Oh my Lord, grant me from Your own (power) a good offspring. Verily You are the One who listens the prayer (Al-Imran : 38)

4. Another dua’ for offsprings in the Quran:

رَبِّ أَوْزِعْنِي أَنْ أَشْكُرَ نِعْمَتَكَ الَّتِي أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَيَّ وَعَلَى وَالِدَيَّ وَأَنْ أَعْمَلَ صَالِحًا تَرْضَاهُ وَأَصْلِحْ لِي فِي ذُرِّيَّتِي إِنِّي تُبْتُ إِلَيْكَ وَإِنِّي مِنَ الْمُسْلِمِينَ (Al-Ahqaf 15)

5. رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا ( Al-Furqan : 74)

Rasulullah (PBUH) also used to make dua’ for the son of Umm Sulaim – the companion Anas bin Malik:

اللَّهُمَّ أَكْثِرْ مَالَهُ وَوَلَدَهُ ، وَبَارِكْ لَهُ فِيمَا أَعْطَيْتَهُ

From IslamQA website:

“Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: 

People should make du’aa’ by reciting the prescribed du’aa’s that are mentioned in the Qur’aan and Sunnah, because these are undoubtedly virtuous and good, and this is the straight path. The scholars of Islam and the imams have mentioned the du’aa’s that are prescribed in Islam, and turned away from the innovated du’aa’s, so we should follow them in that. 

Majmoo’ al-Fataawa’, 1/346, 348”.

Can we make dua’ in other languages besides Arabic?

Outside prayers, Yes we can.

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said: 

It is permissible to make du’aa’ in Arabic and in languages other than Arabic. Allaah knows the intention of the supplicant and what he wants, no matter what language he speaks, because He hears all the voices in all different languages, asking for all kinds of needs. 

Majmoo’ al-Fataawa, 22/488-489

May Allah make our children the coolness of our eyes and give them success in this world and the hereafter.