“If you have told a child a thousand times and he still does not understand, then it is not the child who is a slow learner” Walter Barbee

If you find yourself struggling to make your child to listen to you, read more below!

Tip #1 : positive communication

Children have poor logical reasoning skills. This is due to their less developed frontal cortex brain. A

simple “ do not run” might be an obvious instruction but a child might think “if I can’t run, do I skip? Hop? Jump?

That is why replacing a negative command with a positive one might help the child to hear and respond better

Tip # 2: clear instruction

Imagine hearing this request “ Marya, can you please pick up your toys now? Then go wash up it’s almost dinner time. Don’t forget to use shampoo! If you are done can you please hang your towel?”

The instruction is pretty exhaustive isn’t? Children will struggle to remember everything you asked them to do.

Communicate with your child at his level by giving them ONE thing at a time focus on.

Tip #3 age-appropriate

Imagine asking a 2 years old to sit still. The young child might adhere to your rules. But for how long?5 mins? 7mins?

Or imagine asking your preschooler to help you fold the laundry. He might be able to do it but do not expect him to fold as perfect as you always do! At least he is doing his chores!

Acknowledging your child’s abilities and closing one eye on his flaws can help ease your daily parenting’s woes

Tip #4 make it fun

Are u struggling with bedtime routine? Turn this daily routine into something fun! Ask your child to brush their teeth while standing on one leg. Or see who can change into his pyjamas faster.

I know at the end of the day, the last thing you want to do is just rest and make the kids sleep! But trust me, this “fun memories “ are what the kids will remember. And what a small price it is-making them smile at the end of their day instead of yelling at them before sleeping and leaving them laying on their beds with sadness/ hatred in their hearts.

Tip #5 connection

The more the child feels connected towards you, the easier for him to listen to you.

Connect with them with rahmah!

Asking them to do something while you are yelling at them would only make them listen to you grudgingly. Sooner or later, the rebellion will kick in and they will stop listening at you.

Tip #6 emphaty & understanding.

I know we live in a fast paced world now. We feel we need to do so many things in one day. But why don’t we let our child ( and ourself too!) to just pause and breathe in the moment?

Instead of rushing your child to clean up his room NOW , see what your child is doing at the moment. Maybe he is engrossed in reading his favourite book. Instead of jumping in to him, you might want to sit down besides him, ask him what he is doing and gently remind him to please clean his room after he is done reading.

Usually, all this chores/ favours you asked from your child, it is not a life-threatening requests right? So why the rush?

I hope this small sharing helps you to connect and understand your child better inshaAllah!