Schedules. Routines. To-do lists. Daily organisers. You name it. It is so common to see how people in general try to have a structured planning in their lives daily. On today’s topic, I would focus more on how Stay-at-home mothers can manage their day constructively without having a burn out.

Truth to be told, Stay at home mothers’ daily schedule can be mundane. I can attest to that. Waking up at Fajar, Quran time, making breakfast, doing the dishes and laundry, homeschooling the kids, outdoor activities, doing lunch and dinner -all that while making sure the kids are behaving and healthy- every.single.day.

I mean, it is not like we have an urgent meeting to go or an important client to meet. But all those daily to do lists can be overwhelming especially when the mother had no proper daily schedule. She definitely would have a meltdown(just like her toddler who is around her leg all day while She is busy doing her household chores).

You might have seen or buy those daily planner where you can jot down your to do lists. You can chunk everything in one day. But sometimes it can be unbearable. Too many things to do that you just don’t know where to start!

My number one tip is : relax! Take a deep breath, sit down and drink that coffee before it gets cold again(it’s ok to have a second cuppa even though it is not even lunch time yet).

The next thing i would suggest is finding your purpose and setting your priorities.

In Islam humans are created for the sole purpose of Ibadah.

وَمَا خَلَقْتُ ٱلْجِنَّ وَٱلْإِنسَ إِلَّا لِيَعْبُدُونِ

“And I did not create jinns and men except for My worship alone. I did not create them to make a partner for Me” (Az-Zariyat:56)

And the first thing you will be asked upon at the hereafter is Solah.

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The first thing among their deeds for which the people will be brought to account on the Day of Resurrection will be prayer. Our Lord will say to His angels, although He knows best, ‘Look at My slave’s prayer, is it complete or lacking?’ If it is complete, it will be recorded as complete, but if it is lacking, He will say, ‘Look and see whether my slave did any voluntary (naafil) prayers.’ If he had done voluntary prayers, He will say, ‘Complete the obligatory prayers of My slave from his voluntary prayers.’ Then the rest of his deeds will be examined in a similar manner.” 

(Narrated by Abu Dawood, 864; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood, 770). 

So if you now know your purpose in life is for the worship to Allah; does vacumming the house twice a week be one of your main priorities? I am not saying that it is not important- but really,

You can have a million thing to do in a week, but does it matter as how you try to find perfection in your Salah times?

Let me put if this way, if you try to put Salah on your top priority and perform it at the earliest time , you can definitely conquer your day. Because there is barakah in your time. And that is what we want- a productive day filled with the remembrance of Allah.

عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ مُحَمَّدِ ابْنِ الْحَنَفِيَّةِ قَالَ انْطَلَقْتُ أَنَا وَأَبِي إِلَى صِهْرٍ لَنَا مِنْ الْأَنْصَارِ نَعُودُهُ فَحَضَرَتْ الصَّلَاةُ فَقَالَ لِبَعْضِ أَهْلِهِ يَا جَارِيَةُ ائْتُونِي بِوَضُوءٍ لَعَلِّي أُصَلِّي فَأَسْتَرِيحَ قَالَ فَأَنْكَرْنَا ذَلِكَ عَلَيْهِ فَقَالَ سَمِعْتُ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ يَقُولُ قُمْ يَا بِلَالُ فَأَرِحْنَا بِالصَّلَاةِ

Abdullah ibn Muhammad reported: My father and I departed to see our father-in-law from the Ansar, visiting him as he was ill. The time for prayer arrived and he said to some of his relatives, “Young lady, bring me water for ablution that I might prayer and be comforted.” We objected to that from him, but he said, “I heard the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, say: Stand, O Bilal, and comfort us with the prayer.”

Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 4986

Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Al-Arna’ut.

Prayer is the most important pillars of Islam. There is a spiritual relationship between you and Allah, where the heart becomes at ease – an escape from the troubles of the world.

Let the 5 daily prayers be a breather for your busy day. See it this way, Allah calls upon you to “meet” Him 5 times a day in which you can “talk” to Him about your daily struggles. Some sort of winding time.

What we can do is, make our 5 daily prayer as 5 different periods of “recess time”.

That brings us to our next point which is to list down our other daily routines. And where to shuffle it around our Salah times.

This “method” might seems more relaxed and manageable because you don’t rigidly put a specific timing for specific chores.

After listing down your to do lists; you can see that between Fajar prayer and Zuhr prayer is a big chunk of time where you can put in major daily chores at a bigger time frame. Chores that require you to be more physically active. Like doing the laundry, vaccum, prepping meals etc.

Between Zuhr and Asar prayers are a shorter period of time so choose chores which is more laid back and does not require much energy. I also do homeschool during this period because I am the type of person who can only teach wholeheartedly when my major chores are ticked off. Younger kids are getting their nap times too so less distraction for the older kids.

Between Asar and Maghrib time is more suitable for outdoor trips/activities. Let the kids release their energy during this time. So they will get tire of easily and sleep earlier.

Between Maghrib and Isya should always be Quran family time because it is such a short period of time that you can do revision on the surahs you memorised.

After Isya would best be bedtime routines, reading session with the kids, folding laundry kind of stuffs.

Before and after Subuh is actually the perfect me-time for stay at home mothers. You know how you spent the rest of the days with the kids listening to their stories that you can’t even hear yourself? This is the perfect time to clear your thoughts. Do something enjoyable for yourself. Make your own morning routine. Review your planner on what you are going to do that day- See how you can blend it in your daily prayers.

On days that you can’t manage it all, find solace in the next daily praye and drop that chore that bugs you at the back of your mind. You can just move it to another “recess time” or you can postpone it to other days

The key here is just to work your daily schedule into your daily prayers- everything will then fall into places beautifully. Putting Allah as your main priority, Allah will then ease your other affairs inshaAllah

May Allah make our days productive and filled with barakah and may Allah always lighten the burdens of mothers trying to raise their children to be more God-concious .